Happy Friday! It was a stormy day in Texas yesterday and throughout the night but the rain gave way to a beautiful morning with perfect temperatures. I’m super excited to be joining Carly Jo for lunch at the park today while she is on a field trip for school. Personally I’ve always loved seeing my kids in their element at school socializing with their friends and just observing how they interact.
Do you remember friendships as a child? You know, back when they were easy and you didn’t have to really fit in a click or share all the same interest. Back when you didn’t have to be a work outside the mom who no longer felt included when your best friend became a SAHM and you no longer had the same schedules making it harder to relate. Remember when you could have cared less what your friend was doing for you and enjoyed more what you were doing together? Friendships definitely get harder and more complicated as we grow up don’t they?
But do they really have to? Have we over complicated it all by turning the focus on ourselves and spending our time worrying about our own feelings? I know I have. I’m one of those friends who loves reaching out, who loves setting dates for dinner and keeping in touch. Some of the women in my life I consider some of my closest friends do not have this same trait. I am still guilty sometimes of starting to wonder and ask the question do they really even like me? Am I annoying? Am I boring? Have I done something to offend them? Is it because my house isn’t nice enough, my kids aren’t polite enough, my hospitality isn’t up to par? I’m also guilty going into shut down mode…you know, I’m not going to ask them to dinner or text them until they reach out first. All of these things are more about me, not them. If there is someone in my life who I love (or even just like) and spending time with them is a positive in my life then I’m going to continue to be the one to reach out. It may only be to deliver goodies once a year at Christmas or it may be an email or text sharing some special memory at random. Every single time I reach out and know in some way I’ve blessed a friend’s day it fills my heart.
With social media the “friendship” thing becomes even harder when you wonder why you were unfriended in the first place. How can someone you only new online leave such a sting? Again, this is more about you and not them.
I receive daily emails from (in)courage and today’s email shared a new bible study about friendship. You can download a couple of free chapters of the book Never Unfriended here and the first weeks lesson of bible study here. I can’t wait to take a look! At this point in my life I think I have this figured out for the most part though satan loves to come and fill my head with nonsense. I really want to arm myself with wisdom and words to help my daughters navigate this world of friends in a healthy way.
So I’d like to know, what has been your biggest challenge with building friendships over the years?
Wishing you all a beautiful weekend!